Simone's Game Report

And just like that its Monday again. Noel reviewed the game, there were many variables; different attitudes to risk, the Banker had different attitudes to different to players, each box had a different amount of money, but according to Noel there was one uncanny constant - dramatic television viewing. Sorry Noel, DOND can be dramatic, sometimes breath-taking, but it can also be dull, frustrating, anger-inducing and even embarrassing - it's only constant is that it is unmissable. 'Could this be a mega money Monday?' asked Noel, 'for....Simone'.

Someone hit the blog on Saturday with the search words 'Deal or no deal simone £250,000', so I've been waiting for this. Simone took the walk of wealth with box 19. A bubbly, buxom Trisha Goddard, her hubby Phil was in the audience. Simone reckoned she was a kind, compassionate bank manager - so she was a good liar then. But she didn't look like a liar....

Round one: Joan box 3 - £100. Stevie, she was going for the black Widow, had Mark on Saturday broken her run? Stevie opened box 17 - £50, at this rate it won't be long before Stevie gets the call, the Banker would have been too frightened up until now. Lee, the new guy was wearing blue, he opened box 20 - £750. She went for Buzz. 'Really, really, really?' said Noel, clearly thinking that Buzz had red before when Stevie was blue. 'Never change your mind', said Simone. Box 13 - £500. 'Only one person has achieved an all blue opening round' said Noel, so that was it, the hug of heartbreak. Fran, box 6 - £100,000. The opening offer from the Banker was £5500. 'No deal' said Simone, excitedly enjoying the moment when she was first asked the only question in the show.

Round two: Yvonne, box 21 - £5000. She turned to find her husband in the audience, 'Give me a number babes, we can share the blame'. Phil went for box 18. Jo opened box 18 - £20,000. 'You see' said Simone to Phil, 'typical man, hasn't followed the rules...', said Noel. Scott, box 8 - 10p. Simone rubbing her hands, looking to her next choice, forgetting that it was time for an offer. The structure had changed, we should have had a break by now. Instead the Banker phoned with an offer. Noel wrote down the amount and showed it to the camera (£15,000), he showed it to the audience and to the contestants' would you say mmmmm?', said Noel at each point. Simone had to wait until after the break to find out how much it was, she said 'mmmmm'. Phil felt it was a very high second offer, 'but there were more deals'. Simone said, 'Come-on, there is £250,000 in there', pointing at her box, 'what's that about - no deal'.

Round three: Richard, box 5 - £10,000. Stunning Becca, box 1 - £15,000. 'ooooooo' said Noel, sounding like a ghost. He felt she was in a groove of reds. 'Blue... blue... blue', started Simone, getting the audience to join her chant. Then she went for Colin, and this spoiled the flow. Colin wanted to say something, the chant dried up as Noel repeatedly shouted to him to open the box, becoming increasingly frustrated with Colin's intention to try to say something that no-one was going to understand. Eventually he opened his box 11, Colin had been effectively silenced - £250. Again Simone wanted to keep going. The offer was £10,000. Simone's voice shaking now, 'it gets tricky when you get to this point', her voice trailing away, nerves kicking in, she had just lost £5000, not good for a bank manager - 'no deal'.

Round four: Drew, box 9 - £35,000. Simone sucked her teeth, the energy was slipping fast, the glint in her eyes was fading. Suzanne, box 15 - 50p. Trisha was moving out, Aretha Franklin singing the blues was moving in, she raised her arms to the heavens, but there was no smile, just relief. After the break, 'its not easy, your whole destiny lies in these few minutes' said an exhausted Simone. Daz opened box 22 - £1000. Simone was going to choose another box, getting the audience to chant, again forgetting that she had just chosen three boxes. The offer now was £18,000. 'There is one more deal', said Phil. 'Babe are you sure, are you sure?', said Simone. Now this was a little bit like Maxine's outburst, but the dynamics were different, Simone was a big soft cuddly woman, and she and Phil were very much a team - 'no deal'.

Round five: Teresa, box 12 - £50,000. Peter, box 16 - 1p. Simone rushed over to hug and kiss Peter. Peter disappeared for a while, enveloped by Simone (lucky man). James, box 14 - £3000. Unbelievably Simone wanted to keep going , trying to get the audience to chant 'blue' again. 'There are kids watching going, Mum that lady, she can't count' said Noel, making fun of this bank manager. But this was getting seriously interesting, Simone had three blues, against £250,000 and £75,000. The offer now was £25,500. 'Can I come down?' asked Phil. 'Babe, I think you should deal'. Simone was stunned,' Do you really?' She was upset that her time in the limelight might be over. Phil retracted, remembering that she was in the hot seat, 'I'll be behind you whatever'. Simone immediately revived, 'we'll survive no matter what, lets do it'. Phil nodded his agreement, licking his lips, his mouth dry with fear. 'No deal', said Simone, adding 'This is crazy!' Indeed it was.

Round six: Janie, box 7 - the crowd were again chanting blue, this time without any encouragement from Simone. The lid lifted on £250,000 and the chanting crumbled away. Simone was against her hands, her eyes had gone, she knew it was the end. Noel talked up the £75k but Simone knew it would be in the next box, she was cold and alone. She went for Louise as if choosing a last supper, box 4 - £5. Ok it wasn't red, but the next one would be - her eyes were dead. Box 10, Nessie - £10 - suddenly Simone was alive again, her eyes shone like stars, the crowd screamed loudly, Simone was hugging Phil. The board had £1 and £75,000, the offer now was £15,500. 'Thats pure evil' said Simone angry now, that the Banker had dropped his offer by so much. But it is bad to be angry, you make bad decisions when angry. And it wasn't just Simone, Phil was angry too, whispering 'go for it'. They were seeing the £75k, ignoring the £1. Simone asked for the question and quickly said 'no deal'. I thought, 'Where is this woman's bank, I have a bridge I want to sell her'. The banker phoned back immediately, Phil answered. They had the option of swapping. 'No thank you Mr Banker I am not swapping' - this lady was not for turning. The contestants held hands, the audience held their heads. 'You do not deserve to go away with just £1. I just hope this room is about to go beserk' said Noel, he pulled away the seal and opened her box - £1. Noel sunk his head on to the desk, Simone fell into the arms of Phil, Phil managed to stay standing and the audience eventually managed to clap in sympathy. The £75,000 was in the missing Carlton's box 2, opened by Fran.

Including Simone, only ten people have come away with £1 or less since the beginning of DOND. This was hard on Simone (and Phil); she had played the game, she had taken some big risks, and she had produced a very entertaining game, but there was a moment of truth at the end of round five. And in going forward from there, Simone was lost in the lure of the game. I think there are very few who can say with accuracy what they would have done in Simone's position.

Simone won £1