Gaz's Game Report

Tuesday, its the middle of the week, back to work after the bank holiday, only DOND to look forward to really. Today its Gaz, a scrawny, short-haired quiet man, who had said almost nothing as a contestant, somehow he reminded me of Billy from Eastenders. Gaz has been a regular reader and contributor to this blog and he emailed me earlier today to let me know that it would be him, so no surprise there, however he didn’t let on how he did, so I was forced to watch the show...ho hum.

Gaz was Garry Hall from the Isle of Wight. He owns an ice cream parlour and is a retained fire-fighter. I think this is the third firefighter that has sat on the hot seat, and again his woman – his wife Debbs - is beautiful, girls please tell me what it is about bloody firemen! They have two children, and one of them had created a box for Gaz, containing the £250,000. He believed in fate and destiny and was going to develop a system as he went along, although he did have special numbers that he was going to call out when he felt the time was right. Gaz looked pale and drawn, he was clearly not comfortable in the public gaze, but he was trying to smile nonetheless.

Round one: He started with his first special number – 14. The box belonged to Sarah (ah Sarah, it could have been us..she’s probably married to a boody fireman too), she was wearing a blue shirt, and red liptstick. Maybe it was the lighting, but the red lipstick was like a beacon. She opened her box - £250,000 – straight away the game had changed. Gaz dropped his head. True to his uniform, Gaz picked out another of the DOND beauties, Emma B, also from the Isle of Wight with box 7 - £5000. It was beginning to dawn on Gaz that beautiful women were not helpful, he went for Patrick, box 2 - £50,000 – and believe me Patrick is in no way beautiful. ‘oooo Gaz, this is starting to feel like a very painful round’, observed Noel , clearly taking a masters in the bleeding obvious. Some of the contestants were beginning to pray. Back to the gorgeous women, Emma D next with box 6 – 10p. At this point Gaz’s nerves were beginnig to fray, his voice shaking as he went for Sandy and box 3 - £50. Noel suggested that as a firefighter he was prepared to take a risk, but the banker wanted to focus on Gaz as the ice cream man with jokes about mint, and not much lolly. The banker’s opening offer was £1099, the 99 being another ice cream reference. Gaz was up to this, he told Noel to phone back and ask for the banker to put hundreds and thousands on it. ‘No Deal’

Round two: Raj, rubbing his hands, the game felt cold, he opened box 18 - £20,000 – reds were disappearing from the board at a rate of knots. June, the new girl (she’ll be happy with that description) opened box 9 - £250. Gaz at no point seemed happy. He chose Tom next, but Tom felt sure he had a large amount in his box, he was hoarse, his voice had gone for some reason (I suspect nocturnal activities). Tom would, like us, have to wait until after the break, but on the return Gaz changed his mind, he had time to reflect on Tom’s instinct, and he went for Rich instead with box 4 - £75,000. This was not going well, Gaz seemed incapable of staying away from the reds. On the desk in front of him, Gaz had box 13 – it was his birthday date, and he felt it was always lucky. The banker offered £4100, which was regarded as fair. Gaz was clear on his intention – ‘No Deal’ - he turned to his wife who was clapping furiously in the audience, she was mouthing ‘all the way’.

Round three: Tan, box 20 - £750, good. Max, box 10 - £3000, even better. Susie box 22 - £35,000, ouch. The game just would not get off the ground, for every step forward, there was another taking him back to the start. Raj advised Gaz to believe that he had the £100,000, Gaz agreed, in fact I think he had probably thought of that first. This was now pretty much a one box game. Of course there were still £10k and £15k in play, but they were along way behind the £100k. The offer was now £2050. Gaz looked round to his wife, he had promised his two children a nice holiday – Debbs encouraged him to keep going. He looked back to Noel – ‘No Deal’.

Round four: Pat, box 16 was very business like, not her usual jovial self, maybe she felt that things were not going to get better. Pat was right - £15,000 - the safety net was disappearing fast. ‘There’s a lot of blues out there’, said Gaz, talking up his position, and the audience wanted to believe in him, but they didn’t really - this was Mr Loser, the mayor of Loserville on national Loser Day. Patricia, box 17 - £10 – a small ray of hope in a sea of gloom. Aagin Gaz looked round to Debbs, he asked if she wanted to pick a number, presumeably it couldn’t be worse than his choices so far. After much coaxing she went for Morris, with box 11. Today’s ode was something like ‘Gaz, to more-money heaven, lets have a blue in box number 11’ - £5. I hate his poetry, but you’ve got to love Morris, he’s a real character. Of course the audience were clapping much more loudly now, Gaz had only pulled one red in that round, but it was all to late....wasn’t it? The board showed five blues against three reds, the £100,000 was still there, but so was the 1p. The offer was £3000. ‘I think you get the best out of people if your treat them with respect, and I respect his offer’, said Gaz, considering his position this was tremendous; Gaz was still working the Banker. He went on, ‘There is £100,000 still out there and I am only going to be in this position once – No deal’. At one level this was only to be expected, the offer was very low. But against a board containing two reds above it, and oblivion below – this was brave. Good for Gaz! The audience wanted to believe, they liked Gaz, they liked Debbs, they liked Noel, they liked DOND – but this was a train crash waiting to happen, it was only a matter of time before someone opened the £100,000 and Gaz and Debbs would return to their kids with a holiday in the garden.

Round five: Dave, box 5 - £100, a great start, the crowd now cheering wildy, the tension ramping up. Gaz scanning the boxes, glints of light from the depths of his hollowed out eyes, he went for Gary and box 8 – 50p. Suddenly like a shaft from heaven, people were beginning to see the light, the audience were cheering very loudly now, Noel remarking on what a fantastic turnaround we were witnessing. Gaz took his time, the contestants were holding hands in communal prayer, the crowd shouting encoragement. He went for Terry (back to the gorgeous women, was this really the right time to do that Gaz?). She described Gaz as ‘a top bloke, I’m gonna really really miss ya’, and opened box 12 - £1000. The audience cheered widly, and Gaz was finally happy, relaxed and in the groove – his kids were getting a holiday overseas...Southampton maybe. The banker offered £8200, apologising for some of his earlier, derogatory remarks. Yes the £100k was still there, but the 1p was also on the board, this could still turn out very badly. Debbs came down and at Gaz’s insistence, sat in the chair - she was now counselling caution, albeit only slightly - ‘I’ll still love you no matter what’, she said. But Gaz was still looking at the board, the right-hand side of the board - ‘No deal’. Noel was almost laughing in his excitement, I think he felt he could relax in his role as the good angel, Debbs was now at Gaz’s side. As Noel moved to the wings the crowd were roaring and stamping their feet.

Round six: Three blues against two reds. Lofty lifted the lid on box 1 – they thought it was 1p and started to yell, but it was £1, so they continued to yell but left a little in the tank. Tension was somewhere between high and maximum now, fingers were crossed throughout the studio. Gaz selected Jason, box 21 - £500 – another blue, the audience screaming, stamping feet, yelling encouragement – Gaz being stroked by Debbs, a technique she probably taught him when she was giving birth. He went for serious Simon, and box 19 – this time it was 1p and Gaz rushed over to thank him, I am sure I saw Simon smile at that point. What a time to have an all blue round! Gaz was exhausted but in a great position. ‘If you thought £8100 was a difficult decision...’ said Noel. The banker now offered £35,000 and Gaz suddenly stopped smiling. Debbs whispered ‘its a very good offer’. Gaz mentioned a drop of £25,000 during his discussion with her. The contestants were asked and they gave a split decison. Was he thinking of Hilary’s game? Would he deal? Could he possibly go on? He lifted his head, and with tremendous courage and dignity, he said ‘No Deal’.

[Now here again is our problem with this show – no swap was offered.]

Noel lifted the seal and there it was - £100,000 - you could have hit Gaz with a fire engine, he wouldn’t have noticed. Debbs hugged him, but Gaz was just bending over trying to get air, ‘is this for real?’ Tom lifted the lid on £10,000 to finish, but he had to return to his box to do it, all the contestants had run over to Gaz to hug him. This was the second highest amount given out so far by DOND UK.

A great result, an incredibly exciting game, and Gaz deserved every penny - he had acted with real courage, and he had played the game.

Gaz won £100,000