Richard won £13,000

Welcome to the dream factory, announces Noel. DOND was about the ‘if only’, ‘if only Dot had stopped at £12,000’ he reflected. Today’s flashing lights stopped on Richard and box 2. I forgot he was a contestant, he seemed to be part of the furniture, he would leave a big hole in the contestant pool – he had been a major contributor with advice and support to the other players and he was clearly very popular with his peers. Richard had been waiting for 26 shows and I have no idea who he looked like but he somehow reminded me of Geordie, I hoped that he might fair better. Richard had brought photos of his little girl, and that was as much as this big man from Yorkshire was revealing about himself.

Round one: Terry the new girl, and just like a box of chocolates (how many times will she have heard that), opened box 20 - £50,000. Tom next with box 19 - £1000. Patricia opened box 13 – 50p – finally giving the audience a chance to cheer something. ‘My mate Lofty’ said Richard, box 17. ‘I hope you win as much as you can drink’, said Lofty - £500. Richard was considering each box very carefully, he went for Francesca, box 8. She didn’t hang around, flicking open the lid in the belief that it was trivial… but she was wrong - £100,000. The banker claimed to be beamed live by satellite from Mauritius, he was spending the money the contestants had failed to win – ‘they were cursed’. The offer was £1313 pounds – Richard just nodded his head , it was never going to happen in the first round. [The banker was actually just working from home.]

Round two: Richard wasn’t keen on hair – but the more skin he revealed the bigger the clue he gave the banker; his face, neck, ears and back of his head, were rapidly turning scarlet, the nerves were kicking in. Pat had box 12, she had stood beside Richard until today and she was missing him already, he was her dancing partner in these wild hotel parties - £750. [You know it might be an idea for hotels to offer DOND theme weekends, where everybody arrives as complete strangers and then they all get completely hammered together before leaving on the Monday with 1p. Send me money for the idea if you do it. ] Box 15 by serious Simon - £3000. Richard took his time, scanning the boxes, he picked out Morris. After the break Morris finally delivered an ode with style, ‘Yorkshire tea, box number three, boom’ - £1. The banker thought Richard was worthy of immense respect, he had certainly given a good account of himself during his games in the wings. The offer was £12,000, and I could see his mind ticking. The banker would have noted this too, already we were at Richard’s threshold but he couldn’t stop at the end of Round two. Noel asked the question and Richard was still thinking, some players roll this out to create their idea of dramatic tension, but not Richard, he was giving everything serious thought, eventually he said ‘No deal’, but I think it was a close run thing.

Round three: Hilary, box 1 - £250,000. Richard’s head stayed in his hands for the longest time, this was Dot’s game all over again; she rejected £12,000 yesterday, and then the very next box was the big one. If you have ever been close to someone when they get a kick in the nuts you will understand Noel’s reaction, he just stood there and waited for Richard to lift his head. Emma B shouted ‘come on Rich’, and the audience clapped a little, but he was hurt. He selected Susie’s box 11, she warned that her boxes had been getting progressively higher, but he still went for it - £10,000. Finally he went for Raj, box 9 - £15,000 – another red, an all-red round. ‘We’ve got another horrendous game’, said Noel, abandoning any attempt at encouragement. The offer was £3100, the amount Dot took home. ‘Trying to do joined up dots’ said Noel. ‘No deal’ said Richard, this was the first time he had made a decision quickly. Now the thing is Dot could have won a lot of money if she kept going, but she didn’t have the nerve and anyway we couldn’t have coped even if she had. But this was Richard, and if the game continued on the same path then he needed to keep going to the end.

Round four: Tan was next with box 21, he asked if 21 meant anything to Richard – No – well it was Tan’s lucky number, he opened the box - £10. Noel was wading through treacle trying to raise the atmosphere; following Tan’s box he hoped that this was the pivotal round. Gaz opened box 5 - £5, the crowd cheering and Richard yelling like a Viking, a bald Viking. Richard spent forever scanning the boxes, his eyes almost boring into them, so Noel called a break to give him more time. After the break Richard called for Massimo to open his box 18 - £100, and Richard cheered for Britain an all-blue round to restore the balance. The board had four reds against four blues, including the £75,000 and the £50,000. In the banter Richard said that before the game began, he felt that ‘today was the day to do well’, and he still felt that. He was talking up the game, trying to convince the banker that he was going to the end – the offer now moved away from Dot’s game - £13,000. Presumably 13 to reflect ‘the curse’, the banker’s theme for today. Richard thought long and hard, as usual, but the board contained three amounts higher than the offer. Suddenly I looked up from the keyboard and realised that he was about to mouth the word ‘Deal’, where did it come from? ‘Sorry Noel, its just what I needed’.

Round five: Max opened box 22 – 10p, this was not looking good. Next Sarah, lovely, gorgeous Sarah with box 16 - £20,000. Patrick opened box 7 – 1p – Dot’s game was still in the shadows. Richard smiled like Edward G Robinson after he had been shot.. The offer would now have been £21,500. At this point Richard explained that he had decided beforehand that £13,000 would have been one of his trigger levels.

Round six: Sandy, box 6 - £250. Emma D, box 10 - £5000. Somebody cheered but it was the lowest red. Box 4, Dave opened the lid on £75,000, today Smiler had got it right for the first time in ages. The banker would now have offered £9000 against a board of £35,000 and £50. So Richard had dealt one round too early (if we go with that logic).

Richard felt that given the board’s current scenario he would have gone on, with a 50-50 chance of winning £35,000 – Noel opened the box to reveal how bad that would have been, he only had £50 in his box. The £35,000 was in Emma B’s box 14. Richard was taking home £13,000, the highest amount of the week so far, but to do it he had been forced to deal early. Just like Dot he must be thinking - ‘if only’.